Sunday, August 8, 2010

My Boys

Exactly 2 years ago today {on 8-8-08} Chris got down on one knee as my boyfriend, stood up as my fiance and promised to be my husband forever! Best day ever! Here's to our engagement anniversary bunce! I'll be eating chocolate the entire plane ride to Vegas to celebrate.

{This pic taken right after we got engaged!}

I am taking off for the week. But I wanted a post about my two boys because I will miss them so much. Ahh...my two boys. Aside from giving me unconditional love and making my life complete I really love my boys for just making me laugh...

Exhibit A

It's no secret that Chris talks in his sleep. It is extremely entertaining for me. I crack up when it happens and then the next day when I tell him about it I laugh even harder...usually not even getting the story out. I have a lot of stories but here's the sleeptalk of the week...

{Chris suddenly sits up in his sleep...eyes closed...waving both hands in front of him very quickly as if he is warding of a ferocious animal}

Chris: No no......no no no.....no NOOOO no!

Melissa: Babe....wake up...its ok....you're just dreaming.

Chris: {Responds very annoyed like I was insane for suggesting such a thing} Oh yeah?...then why is there an..an....an OUTLINE....of uh.... uh uh a creature... RIGHT OVER THERE? {shouts that last part as if to warn me to run and stretches his arm as far as it can go to point to the corner of the completely empty room}

{I start crackin and bustin up because of how serious and worried he was....he's usually really out of it}

Me: What kind of creature?

Chris: {lays back down..eyes still closed} I don't know probably an endangered species of some sort..............{long pause} like a bison...... {sound asleep}.

Hahaha...classic.

Exhibit B:

So I don't take Houshie to my nanny job with me now that there is an infant child in my care. And that lil chub has to be let out every 4 hours or else he will piddle and diddle all over the place. So I absolutely HAVE to take him out right before I leave for the day and then Chris takes him out when he's home for his lunch break.

The other day I was running late and I knew I couldn't be because I had to stop and get gas and the Nanny Mom had to be at a Dr.'s appointment. So I was all ready...outfit, hair, makeup...with purse in hand. And opened the front door to leave when I glanced back and saw the mini black and white chewbacca asking me {with his eyes and blank stare} if I was gonna forget all about him and just leave. I thought for a sec about just putting him in the laundry room and letting him leave a few stinky pebbles for Chris to pick up when he was home for lunch. Instead I uggghhed and let the Poosher come outside with me to potty really quick so I could be on my way. On the way down the stairs I told him he only gets 2.5 seconds or he gets no treat.

We have a rather large grassy knoll, if you will, right outside and the pup usually just stops just inside the grass boundary lines to squat and then runs in for his aforementioned treat.

On this particular day he decides to take his time and stroll through the green pasture until he finds a spot to his liking which happens to be as close to the exact center of the knoll as you can get. He takes the longest pee of his life and at the exact second that he is about to stop I hear a horrible noise. You know when the sprinklers are about to start and you hear that gushing squirt of the water escaping for the first time? So I think "shoot...now he will be all wet and make the laundry room smell all nast" but "oh well...whatcanyado?". I expect him to run out as soon as the first drop hit him because he HATES water. But on this "i'm in a hurry" day he decides to be weird.

He didn't move a muscle. He started getting drenched and he stayed absolutely as still as can be. And to make it worse, he was staring at me. I mean eyes were locked. He stood in the middle of the grassy knoll getting sopping smelly dog wet with 5 sprinklers hitting him and stared at me as if to say "I know you're about to leave me for the day so I am going to stand right here until you come and pick me and my straggly wet fur up allthewhile getting you and your fresh 'ready for work' outfit drenched so you will have to change and be even more late for work".

So I tried everything to get him out of there. Patted my knees. I tried calling in my high dog friendly voice. I tried telling him he will get extra treats. And I tried acting like I wouldn't be mad once he got to me. He called my bluff and stood his ground. It was creepy. I got that feeling I get when I see little children in scary movies. You know what I'm talking about...? How they somehow make a lil kid singing a kid song seem scarier than a giant faceless psycho serial killer?

So I decided to fall back on my last resort and run. Yes I did look like an idiot...thanks for asking. If you start running he will always follow because it gets him excited. Sometimes I even just run from the kitchen to the couch just to see him get excited and then act like I fell asleep to see him thoroughly confused. So I ran from the sidewalk to the stairs without looking back. That's a good distance and where I ended up I couldn't even see the knoll anymore. At the stairs I expect to see him by my side but I was all alone. Dun dun duuuunnnnnn. So I hesitantly walk back and find exactly what I was scared of. HE WAS STILL IN THE SAME EXACT SPOT BUT HAD HIS HEAD TURNED LOOKING AT ME. Freaky dog. He was soggy and the water was still hitting him. I couldn't handle it anymore. I was late and now I was getting scared. I had no choice. I waited until the moment I would get the least wet and ran in to grab him.

Yes I got wet. No I didn't change. Yes I was late. No he didn't apologize. Rude.

But who got the last laugh? Well I didn't give him his treat BUT when I got home and Chris was at the gym I opened the laundry room door and there he was with an innocent look on his face and two doodles right next to him that he knew I would have to clean up. Well played Houshington. Well played.

You be the judge.

{Perfect representative of them} {♥}

4 comments:

  1. I've heard Chris talk in his sleep. It's a laugh riot! Your stories cracked me up.

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  2. I'm still laughing I don't know who I adore the most...Chris or Houshie

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  3. I just laughed my head off...I love those stories!!! Oh how I miss you two!

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  4. please keep them coming!!! your posts crack me up and are adorable!! i love the way you write!!!

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